Update on David's Friend

Thanks to everyone for your comments, emails, prayers and concerns! David's friend mentioned in the previous post is doing well! She is off the ventilator now and we think her feeding tube was removed today. Her kidneys are functioning at 90% now, so there does not seem to be permanent damage. Her son is still with her at the hospital. After her release from the hospital and a quick trip through town to pack up some personal items of hers, she will live with her son and his family in Arizona. I'm so glad she pulled through.

Check in with your Friends, Friends

When David was the manager at DQ, he met lots of people, and as a result, he has many more friends than he did before he started working there. People still know him as the DQ manager, even though he's been gone for almost two months now. Others have been very vocal that it's not the same without him. (I don't want to get into the negatives here.) When we go to the store together, he runs into so many of these friends. While it makes for some long shopping trips, I don't care. It's fun to meet and catch up with other people in town.

You would probably be surprised to know how many elderly folks use the DQ as their connection to the outside world. One of the benefits of David being the manager was that he got to see these elderly folks several times a week and check on them. Consequently, he helped a few who needed assistance. He became good friends with one particular elderly lady who lives alone and doesn't have any family in the area. She is fiercely independent, headstrong, and very stubborn. She is retired from the military (Air Force, I think) and also has a second retirement as, I think, an assistant to a high-ranking official, but I don't remember which government agency. She usually came to the DQ in the mornings before opening hours, but David never turned her away, even when they were closed. He always made sure she had coffee and something to eat. Sometimes, she came in later in the day and ordered off the DQ menu. More often, though, David prepared something for her from food he kept in the fridge for just such an occasion. (The local DQ doesn't serve breakfast.) Sometimes, she brought her bills in and David helped her sort out and pay her bills. Sometimes, her electricity got shut off, not because she didn't have the money to pay, but because she needed help with the reminders. David gently nudged her into setting up her accounts on automatic payment, but she never wanted to do that, so he went by her house often to check on her, to make sure everything was running smoothly, to help her pay her bills, to take out her trash, and to see if she had enough food. During one visit when I accompanied him, we learned that she had a son somewhere in Arizona, but she would not offer too much information because she was afraid we might call him and her son would make her leave her home that she loves so much. At the time, she was doing quite well on her own except for the bill-paying problems, so there wasn't a reason to think she couldn't continue. She got around well enough, still ran some of her own errands, and generally cared for herself.

Yesterday morning, David went into town to apply for a particular job he saw in the paper, and before he came back home, he stopped by the elderly lady's house. Her car was in the driveway, but the gate, which is usually closed and latched, was open. David went to every door, called her on the phone, etc., but couldn't reach her. He called the DQ to ask when they'd last seen her, which was three days ago. He had stopped by her house last week, but her car was gone, so he thought she may have gone to visit family in Arizona for the holidays. But they had seen her at the DQ since then.

It wasn't unusual for her to avoid coming to the door. Usually, when she realized it was David, she came to the door. He considered that maybe her son or another relative picked her up for the holidays. But something just didn't feel right, particularly because the gate was open. During past visits, when she was at home, the gate was always secured. David went to the sheriff's office to see if they could assist him in getting into the house, and they went back over there together. The doors were locked with chairs wedged under the door handles, her method of extra security. (My own grandmother did this as she aged. She worried about break ins.) They finally found an unlocked hidden door that led into her bedroom and managed to get the chair out from under the door handle. They found her on the bathroom floor, and immediately called emergency services. She was conscious but not in very good condition. They suspected her hip or leg was broken. She thought she was lying in her bed. She didn't realize she was on the bathroom floor.

While all this was going on, David called me at home.  I immediately went to work, googling her name and any other information I could find about someone in Arizona with the same last name. Unfortunately, she has the same name as a celebrity, which makes it tough to find info about anyone but the celebrity! However, I found her sister's obituary, which led me to her sister's surviving husband (a former postal employee of many years), which led me to his obituary, which led me to his surviving sons, who (in 2007, at least) were living nearby. I was frustrated, though, because I couldn't find telephone listings for anybody in these obituaries. One of the guys had a blog, but it hadn't been updated since 2008. (Yesterday afternoon, we found out those relatives had moved away.) Back at the lady's house, while they were tending to her, the phone rang and David asked the sheriff's deputy if he could answer it. Miraculously, it turned out to be the son from Arizona! Within a few minutes, he was on his long trip to get to his Mom, but not before David and he had a laugh about how fiercely stubborn she is about maintaining her home and living alone. I think, based on what the son said, he felt guilty that it was David there with his mom instead of him, but the guilt has no basis. Her son did all she allowed him to do for her.

This morning, David went to see her in the hospital. He thought he'd check on her, then take her favorite thing to her, a strawberry shake. Even with HIPAA and all the privacy laws, they have allowed him to visit her and know a little about her condition. David had called the night before to check on her, but wasn't able to talk to anyone about her. Unfortunately, this morning, she is in pretty bad shape, is mostly unaware of what is happening, and is now in renal failure, which could have been caused by dehydration, but who knows. She doesn't "believe" in doctors, so she's had little to no medical care. In spite of this (perhaps because of it?), she is 84 and until now, got around pretty well. (During one of our visits, she told me about the big box full of meds her late sister took daily, and this made her quite angry. She was certain the med interactions had contributed to her sister's death.) David is staying with her at the hospital until they airlift her to a bigger city for more advanced care. Her son hasn't arrived yet, but David reached him by phone, so he has changed routes and is now on his way to the bigger city.

Please keep this lady in your thoughts and prayers. I hope she pulls through, but maybe this is her time. Personally, I don't think she's done yet. David is understandably upset as he has gotten to know her very well over the last year. Her stubbornness and independence reminds David of his own late mother. Whatever the outcome, I hope she is free from pain. I hope she isn't too mad at David. Yesterday, when she was in better shape, she thanked him several times, but was aware that her living-alone days may be over. She's such an interesting person with so many stories to tell.

The point of my story is this... when your inner voice nags you, listen to it! Better to be wrong now than sorry later. Also, don't question or doubt the reasons for your circumstances. (This lesson is for me.) If we had more money to spare right now, we would have been traveling. We are free to do whatever we want right now because I'm taking vacation and holiday time, and don't have to be back at work until Jan 3. This lady would have stayed on her bathroom floor, perhaps with a very sad and lonely ending to her story.

Take care, dear readers, and enjoy this holiday season.

PS22 Chorus

Check them out! I'm sure you've seen them before, but definitely worth revisiting. The PS22 Chorus (of 5th graders) on Staten Island, NY.  You'll be glad you did.
http://ps22chorus.blogspot.com/



This semester's finals are over. It's time for winter break.

Faith... Or I Just Don't Know Myself Lately

When David lost his job, I panicked. Really. And I was angry. He had done such a good job, and nepotism had taken his job away from him. I projected WAY out into the future, a future of doom, gloom, poverty, and lack. But then something strange happened. I realized that we had planned, so we had a bit of a cushion. I realized that we had downsized our lives, so our expenses are less than ever. And I realized that I have a choice in what I will think and believe about our future.

I started listening to those around me. I listened to Jesse, who said that this door closed so another, better door could open. I listened to Tessa, who said that better things are ahead. I listened to Rick, who questioned if David could continue working almost every day without a day off, often 12 to 14 hours a day. I listened to Karen, who said God has a unique plan for us. I listened to Grace, who said we deserve good things. I listened to Debbie, who said, "Tell David to sell sprouts at the Farmers' Market!" I listened to my inner voice that reminded me the reason we came here was to start over and live a simpler and uncomplicated life. And the voice that further told me that David's job couldn't fit into that plan. And I noticed that not one single person offered any doom and gloom, poverty, or lack when they spoke the positive things into my life.

So I made a decision to believe for the best outcome. I relaxed (mostly). I put the kibosh on the negative thinking, but more importantly, I replaced the negative thinking with a heartfelt request for faith. And I asked God for the lesson so I can move on (because I do believe that this is my lesson to learn, not David's).

I started out in life as an optimist. But year upon year of bad events in my life from my mid-20s to mid-30s turned me into a pessimist, and I got very skilled at expecting the worst... and often getting it. My close friends know I'm not religious, but I am and always have been a believer. I had just convinced myself that I had strayed so far from my path that there was no way to get back on it. But now I have a fresh new outlook. David and I are volunteering more in the community, something David never had time to do before. And David is actually selling sprouts at the farmers' market starting this Saturday. I feel well. I sleep soundly.

And here is the best illustration of Faith that I know. If you haven't seen Faith, the two-legged dog (how is that possible?), just click on the video. Or Google "Faith, the two-legged dog." She is, without a doubt, faith in action.




And if you can't get enough Faith, go to her website to see more videos:
http://faiththedog.info/category/tags/video

The Very Beginning of the Earthbag House

Ok, it's not much, but here is the beginning of the earthbag project. Unfortunately, the bags did not arrive in time for us to start actually placing filled bags. But the late arrival of the bags freed us up to work on the solar oven, the Loo with a View, and the creation of a bit of a fire break around the place.

1. We picked a spot.

 2. We cleared the spot and put a piece of rebar in the center. We tied a rope to the rebar to use as a guide for creating a circle.

3. I dug the trench. It's deeper than it looks.

 4. That rock is smack in the middle of the bedroom. Move to come on moving it.

 

More pictures will follow soon.

So Long, Old Friend.

Dear Waring Pro,

You've been a reliable friend, dear Waring Pro. With your two-burner setup, your 12-cups of hot java in less than three minutes, and your hot water on demand, you've been a tried-and-true companion for many, many mornings. You were a bargain at the best Tuesday Morning in Houston, the one near the corner of Briar Forest and Dairy Ashford, but a bargain not easily had. You were stuck on the top shelf, lonely and unwanted, your box slightly bent and covered in dust, with David eyeing your sleek beauty for months until your keepers finally introduced a 50% -off sale. Yes, they tried to mark your price UP from $99 to $139 at the start of that 50%-off sale, but David, having been ever watchful, snagged you for the bargain price of 50% off $99, or $49.50 + tax to be exact.

You've been with us through 2,867 pots of coffee, 1,283 cups of tea, through the moves, the holidays, the dinner parties, the good times and the bad, the job losses, the job gains, the business successes and the business failures, the sickness and the health, and even the deaths. You've warmed our bodies on chilly winter mornings and awakened us on warm summer mornings, and helped us stay awake through many late nights. You've filled our thermos with warmth and love too many times to count. You're brewed many types of coffee, from regular old Folgers to a hearty Turkish blend. But alas, your circuitry is faulty. You trip the breakers. We prefer not to die in an unexpected inferno, so we send you to your final resting place, dear Waring Pro Professional Coffeemaker Model WC1000. We will miss you forever.

This is for Dani

This photo was inspired by Dani's post on her Eco Footprint ~ South Africa blog about "off grid" appliances and kitchen tools. Check out her blog and that post here: http://ecofootprintsa.blogspot.com/2010/11/kitchen-implements.html

Dani, here is Mother's bakelite hand mixer. I love it and use it at The Home Place.