Changes Part 2

I'm back to check in. The dream is still alive and well, thanks to all of you who have been so supportive and caring. Not much to post here except to say that I am adjusting to the recent changes. Two of my daughters are nearby and my oldest daughter and grandson are currently living here. They have found a house and will be moving in August. I love having all of them here and we have had some fun over the last couple of weeks. I've particularly enjoyed getting out in the evenings to walk around the park, up and down the hills. There is nothing like exercise to clear up the cobwebs in my mind. This is a short post, for sure, but I am so grateful to all of you who have reached out to me and want to say thank you.

Changes

As I type this, my daughters and grandson are enroute to my little town with a Uhaul full of my oldest daughter's things. She is making the heartbreaking move from her old life into a new one. I was very surprised when, in January, my two older daughters and grandson came to visit and fell in love with the area. Neither wanted to leave. I found out later that what I thought were secure lives with committed relationships were none of that. There were even hints of abuse, but I have not been able to get to the details as they are not ready to talk. Tears were cried, decisions were made. Then, my youngest came to visit and felt the pull, too. She wanted to be near her sisters and nephew. By the end of the weekend, all of them will be in town starting new lives.

During all the decision making, my best friend told me that she has decided to move back to her hometown. It's far away in another state. Her family is there and she misses them. As these things always are, it has been a difficult decision for her. I completely understand how she feels and support her 100%. It's even possible that my daughters and grandson could be the next tenants in her darling craftsman-style home. It looked like a near perfect win-win - except I'll be here without a best friend to call and hang out with a few times a week.

Fast forward to a few days ago. I never thought I would find myself alone at this stage in my life, but here it is, so I must deal. My daughters and I are thinking about getting a big house together and splitting the expenses. It seems the only way I can manage since money will be very tight. With all of us working and contributing to the household, I believe it can be done. But what does one do with the dreams and plans one has? Do they evaporate, vanishing into thin air with one big decision? Or do they just rest for a while, waiting for the right moment to come back around? I don't know, but surely all of my hard work will bring me to something - something new and different and not what I originally planned, but something. I don't want my view of my lovely little town to change - from one where I can find quiet time, to be alone and unbothered and yet across town in 5 minutes at my best friend's house to one where I am lonely, alone and isolated. It's a fine line, I think. I just want peace.

The Long Day

Well, it has been a long, long day. Vaguely for now, I will sum things up like this. Life as I knew it is over. Some dreams die. More to come in a day or two when I've had time to figure out what's next. Please keep me in your thoughts.

David Carradine

David Carradine as Cole Younger in The Long Riders





I was saddened to see that David Carridine died. One of my favorite movies of all time is "The Long Riders." I haven't seen it in several years. I will soon add it to my Netflix queue so I can watch it once again. That is if I can get around to watching the Netflix movie that's sitting on top of my DVD player since April 15. There just hasn't been much time for movies lately and I don't want to watch age inappropriate stuff in front of my grandson.

Rest in peace, David Carradine.

I don't know who gets credit for the photos, but they are from here: http://thisdistractedglobe.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/09/longriders2.jpg.

A Rare Weekday Off

I am enjoying a mid-week day off. I have some comp time built up and it's necessary to take it. (Oh, twist my arm, will ya?) So, I had plans to get up very early and get right to work around here. But here I sit, reading the latest news, checking the weather, and catching up on my favorite blog reading. But no guilt!

I just heard the traffic report for my area. It's quite funny as it involved 8 cars on the highway and no animals - dead or alive - between a little town to the west and my little spot of heaven. It struck me, again, that my life is so different than it was last year at this time. I think of my recent history in segments - before I quit my job, after I quit my job and Mom came to live with us, after Mom died and then, the time since we moved to this beautiful unpopulated area where we now live.

So now I'm off to get some work done. We are having a graduation party for Jamie this Friday. She just graduated with a BS in Psychology. We are proud of her. It's time to head to the store.

Family = Love... and Fatigue

My family is still visiting so I haven't had much time to post or keep up with reading my favorite blogs. My three daughters, 2-year-old grandson, Margot the cat and the little dog Little Dog are here. (Yes, the little dog's name is Little Dog.) We have the motor home hooked up and Jamie, Tessa, Margot and Little Dog are staying in it. Kat and Darien are staying in our home's spare bedroom. I love having everyone here. We've been swimming, picnicking, to a baseball game, to the basketball court, run around the park too many times to count. And I've cooked - a lot. We've enjoyed key lime pie, homemade ice cream, cakes, cookies. It has been a long time since we've all been together and I'm happy that we are able to get together. But I am tired. I forgot how exhausting running the house can be, and how much food, toilet paper, water, laundry, dirt passes through our house. Everyone is helpful but there is still much to do. I don't usually use disposable stuff because we try to keep our carbon footprint pretty small around here. But I've even taken to using paper plates. I know lots of Moms, Dads and Grandparents do this daily, but I think I'm getting too old. I've come to the conclusion that people who decide to have babies in their late 40s are just plain crazy. I'm glad I had my daughters in my mid-20s. No offense if you are a 40-something parent to a very young child! (Disclaimer: My parents were in their mid-40s when I was born and almost every day I marvel at how they held up.) My hat's off to ya. I'm just glad it's you and not me because, like I said, I'm getting too old. Now, I'm off to have some cookies as I watch the same 4 episodes of Lassie on DVD for the umpteenth time with my darling grandson...

Whoa!

Today at 6:25 pm:







The local media referred to these as "lime size" hail stones, heh heh.